There is hope for recovery

I recently had a change in my routine and as a result, didn't take my pills regularly. I became a bit manic. The good thing is that eventually I was able to see that I was manic and asked for help. Help was given and I'm doing much better now.

In the past I would have not been able to vocalize to another person what I needed from them. I would have gone into a tail spin that lead me angry, dry and depressed in the end.

Knowing that I still can swing into episodes scares me but there is a comfort that I have come to a place where I realize it when it is happening and have people around me who I can be open and honest with. Being aware of myself is the greatest thing I've learned through this journey.

I remember my fight to get where I am and it has been a challenge but the hard work is well worth it so far. People suffer every day and it's hard when you don't have fight in you. I had no fight in me left and then it was my Mom that fought for me. Most people don't have a Mom like I do but often has someone who is willing to help. Don't miss that help because of blind eyes.

There is light at the end of the tunnel, there is hope when all else is gone, there is recovery of life when you have bipolar disorder.

I.C.E.

I have written on this in the past. It stands for, 'In Case of Emergency.' In the past I suggested you had something written with all your emergency contacts and drugs you take as well as allergies, on a piece of paper under your drivers license. Now there is an app for that now.

Dr's, medics, etc, know to check your phone first when finding out information in an emergency for you. Inputting information about yourself and who people can contact can save your life or at least, help those who are trying to help you.

Bob Brotchie came up with the concept of ICE when he had treated unconscious people without knowing any information about them again and again. Seeing the problem of being limited to treatment because of not knowing the medical history, he came up with a great solution to this problem.

Who wants to wear a bracelet if they have an allergy or medical condition? The concept of ICE gives you freedom from that. First responders now are trained to look for that information in your phone or behind your ID.

Whether you have a medical condition or not, it's a good idea to at least keep information where first responder can find it, of who to contact in an emergency situation. Take the time now to get a free app on your phone and put in information that could help you if your ever in a situation when you can't speak for yourself.

Famous Bipolar People

Jesse Jackson Jr is the latest famous person who has been publicly diagnosed as bipolar and depression. Before that it was Charlie Sheen who wasn't diagnosed in public but many people came to that conclusion. It reminds me of all the famous people in the past who have been thought to have bipolar disorder. What makes them a star when they have such mental issues?

Vincent Van Gogh (an artist), Kurt Cobain (a musician), Robert Downey Jr (an actor), Mel Gibson (actor/Director), Jack Irons (drummer for Red Hot Chili Peppers and Pearl Jam), Debra LaFave (school teacher that had an affair with her student), Frank Sinatra (singer), Amy Winehouse (musician), and many more.

I see the full list of actors and musicians who were and are bipolar and can't help but see a coalition between creativity and mental health issues like bipolar. Not saying that every one who is creative has a mental health issue or that every one with those issues are creative. I just can't help to notice that maybe the benefit of bipolar is creativity, looking at the world differently than others, 

Being famous doesn't make you immune. It may make problems you have worse because of pressure and acceptance of poor judgment. Because they are famous, seeing how they deal with it can help or hinder us. Patty Duke was a famous actor back in the day, she has stepped in front of her illness and has been an advocate like many others.

Bipolar may have helped people be more creative and swings may have given them an edge. What is more powerful than their art is to admit and deal with mental issues in public, even though that's the hardest environment to do it in. Famous people have a responsibility to set a good example more than the rest of us because they have put themselves in a place where people see and listen to them more than others.

My trip to Bali with all it's glorry and struggles

I recently traveled overseas to visit my brother and his girlfriend. I would like to share the benefits and struggles I faced on my trip so that it will help those who are planning on traveling prepare for your trip and encourage those who are afraid because of mental illnesses disabling you.

The last time I went on a major overseas trip was when I was 15 yrs old. It was to Uganda, Africa with my school. My school was sponsoring an orphanage and school there and had a program where we could finish our semester in a shorter time, get credit for going there and enable us to be taught lessons that we could never be taught in Canada while allowing us to affect the lives of others through service. Because this trip I took, meant that I worked hard for the money and also received support of my family and friends. It encompassed my life for a year before I left, after I came home I felt displaced and went into depression. I realized that having such a big goal, working so hard for that goal, the goal consuming my whole life,  when I  achieved the goal there was nothing left.

This time when I planned my trip, one of the things I was aware of was how it would impact me seeing another culture and it's impact on my views on my own culture, so having a goal to make for this trip and afterwards was important. When I was away I was looking for clarity on perception change, how my experiences would affect my life, instead of just going with each feeling and emotion without any internal analyzation.

My goals for when I came home were subject to change depending on what I learned on my trip. One goal has to do with organization in my home and the other with my focus at work. This gave me a purpose instead of having an empty loneliness that comes from a habit of building something that is already done. Another goal was the progression within my life. I need to find a place to live with more room, a healthier environment and succeed at work or find work that will have an environment of success for me.

Another thing I faced was not having enough pills to remain on my schedule because I stayed an extra week and a half. I had to cut them in half so they would last until I got home. I had moments of depression and paranoia.

When I go on vacation, I always bring extra pills just in case. A place like Indonesia doesn't have the same kind of Dr's if you need to get help there so you need to put in place support before you go. I think the Internet is awesome! I was able to Skype friends and family back home when I was feeling uneasy and knew if I really needed to talk with my Phyc Dr, I could as long as I stayed up late at night, because of the time difference.

When I felt anxiety and all my other symptoms of bipolar disorder, one thing that helped was going for a long walk on the beach. Exercise has helped me at home and it helped me there.

The interesting thing for me is how I dealt with my symptoms. I got stressed where my anxiety started to take control, I became paranoid where I thought people were against me and there were intruders all around, and I had moments of depression affecting my will to move and get out of bed. Through all of this I fought back, I kept in my mind how I feel normally now and kept perspective of what I know is real versus what I felt. Some of you don't have the luxury of feeling in control or normal, that can come in time. For those of you who have more good days than bad or are able to remember happiness and control on your life, hold on to that as a center or grounding when you feel crazy emotions that aren't real, that aren't you.

Going on this trip helped me see my strengths as well as weaknesses. It was long enough to make me love the medical care I get from my country and stability I'm able to have by being able to make and keep a schedule. I will miss the people, warm weather and ocean. It helped me relax and listen to the sounds of earth and nature as well as see it. Enjoy the moment and see the beauty in front of me. There are differences in all our cultures, some good and some bad but in the end we are very similar.

Whits End With Mental Illness

Recently I took a class with a mother of an adult bipolar child. She began to share about her struggles with her daughter that she was going through, manic then depressive stage, her reaching her max end of putting up with it. I didn't tell her of my experiences until the last class we had together. I got to hear the struggles she went through unbiased and advise given by others with no personal relations accept they had children, for this problem. It was eye opening to me.

I knew it was hard on family members when I struggled but never realized how hard. In all my pain and torment, I never understood it may have been more difficult for people around me than it was for myself. All I have ever seen was my pain and torment.

I saw her frustration and physical exhaustion in how her daughter was draining her and she was at the point where she needed to start taking care of herself. The same scenario happens over and over again. No amount of reasoning and support makes any difference. The motivation and willingness to change for her daughter needs to come from her wanting it.

As a friend who had no prior experience, I would tell her to take care of herself first and leave the responsibility on her daughter to find her own way. It's not untrue that your first priority should be your own health.

After our last class together, I pulled her aside and said that I knew where her daughter was coming from. I had spent more time in bed than out of it and look where I am now. Mentally functioning well, working full time and going to the gym and eating well. I told her a web site that changed me. She said to me that it was her daughter that needed to make a choice to change and I wanted to be sportive of her emotions and feelings as well as stay true to helping people understand our point of view. I don't know if I can do both so I kept my mouth shut.

Seeing a loved one hurting and going through the same cycles again and again must be tiering. The logic and reasoning loved ones have isn't translating to mentally ill people. It seems like mentally ill people aren't making an effort or deciding to do things that are obvious for others that will be helpful. Gaining weight and blaming it on Rx drugs seems like an excuse. Don't like how you feel? Change your actions!! Isn't that easy for people with mental illnesses.

I would have loved to explain how much I wasn't in control of my moods and emotions. When I was depressed it was all I could do to keep myself alive and not kill myself. Every moment of my life was managing my brain. All the discomfort, thoughts in my mind, things I wanted to do or ideas I got when I was manic was a constant battle. I was in a constant battle of thoughts and feelings that were in contradictions of other thoughts and feelings I had. All seemed real while nothing did. My mind was tearing apart because I knew and realized it's instability. Now that I'm stable I realize how bad it was.

With what I know now, if I had a loved one suffering like I was, I'd try and understand them while keeping my boundaries. Beating your head against a brick wall is not help to either of you.

Understanding, knowledge, compassion, nudging then forceful loving help is what I would do. My parents supported my basic needs and encouraged me in areas of help. I had a wonderful best friend who's uncle is schizophrenic and relating to me helped him understand his uncle and his mothers position in helping him. He would come over to my place once a week and listen to me without judgment as well as almost force me to take a walk with him outside no matter if I hadn't showered in days. All of this support helped me find answers I needed for my recovery.

I also had a mother who saw me and didn't give up. She researched options and even though she couldn't relate, she had a belief that my life could be more, be better than it was. She had faith in me when I threw that out the window years ago. Her research panned out.

There is no easy answer for anyone involved within mental illness. A willingness to understand each other and an openness for empathy goes a long way.

Allergic Disease Linked To Bipolar I

People with airborne allergies can lead to the exacerbation of depression in patients with bipolar I. A study done by Teodor Postolache (University of Maryland School of Medicine, Baltimore, USA) and co-workers shows that 44% of patients who have bipolar I have airborne allergies like pollen and hay fever.

During high exposure to allergens, symptoms of bipolar increased.

It just amazes me how connected each part of our body is. How a physical problem like allergies connect to brain function. My question is what came first? The allergy or the mental disorder.

High Blood Pressure And Bipolar And Hypertention

A Clemson University researcher, James A. McCubbin and colleagues has found that high blood pressure dampens your ability to read emotional content in faces. In our writing and texts it is easy to tell if someone is joking by the smiley face they put behind their sentence when in person it would be easily mistaken.

He calls this emotional dampening. A friend or coworker may make a comment that is meant to be a joke, when unable to read facial expressions it may be mistaken and can lead to anger. This can also lead to distrust and risk taking by not proberly being able to read threats in the environment as well as robing a persons ability to feel enjoyment and personal connections with others.

McCubbin said the link between dampening of emotions and blood pressure is believed to be involved in the development of hypertension and risk for coronary heart disease, the biggest killer of both men and women in the U.S. Emotional dampening also may be involved in disorders of emotion regulation, such as bipolar disorders and depression.

I take a small amount of Pindolol which is a blood pressure medication. I take it for my anxiety and it helps even out my adrenaline.

Implants For Bipolar And Schizophrenic Patients

What would it be like for people who suffer from bipolar disorder or schizophrenia to be able to go to the Dr once every three to six months to be injected with medicine than to take pills two to three times a day? Forgetting to take a pill, or not being able to take it because you got tied up some where and don't have enough on you for the duration is a common issue. Not taking one dose, or taking it late will mess you up emotionally and can sometimes lead to you not caring about the next dose. Being free from that responsibility for months at a time sounds revolutionary.

A new drug that is expected to go on the market in a few months called, NP202, needs to be implanted minimally once every three months. It's a  biodegradable risperidone implant that has a continuous delivery system that can be taken out at any time. It can also be used to treat migraines and Parkinson's disease.

Who wouldn't want this new treatment espesially those who aren't good at taking medication as regularly as they should? This sounds like a miracle option. One problem is that it only works on just under half of patients. Just like all mental health drugs, there is not one pill for everyone. It will take time for all the side effects to be known and the known ones aren't published yet because the drug isn't approved so the company making it doesn't need to share that information publicly which helps them get needed financial funding. One thing that makes me uneasy about it is is what Jane Hollingsworth, the chief executive officer of NuPathe, the company making this drug, said. “There is a need for innovation, but the more innovation you have in your product, the more difficult it can be for [the regulators] to understand it, at least within the review cycle time line. By definition, innovation does not fit in a box or the mold for what has come before, and that can strain the regulatory system, particularly if it is a system that favors caution and safety over innovation.”

This statement makes me fear she may be more interested in some possible good outcomes without caring for adequate safety measures for the others.

This treatment is revolutionary while I wouldn't be the first in line to be a guinea pig.

 

Mentally ill, more likley to be violent?

A new study amongst developed countries show that adults who suffer from mental illness are 4 times more likely to experience violence and 1 in 4 people without a disability have experienced violence in the past year. Hm this sounds like people with mental illnesses are beating on people without.

Actually they are 4 times more likley to be victims of the violence than the perpetrators. This says a lot about out society and how they treat the mentally ill, as well as how people's mental illness affects them so that they live life putting themselves in harms way.

People who suffer from mental illness often are a target because of low self esteem, poor social behaviors, social stress and isolation, neurological impairment, and alcohol and drug abuse.

Media often portrays people with mental illnesses as the ones we should be fearful of, instead society should do a better job of protecting them because they are vulnerable to abuse from others.

How can you help change this trend for the positive? Don't make slide comments to homeless people on the street to find a job because they look physically fit enough to work, they may be suffering from a bigger problem than a broken knee or injured limbs. Engage yourself in a conversation, a kind word or relationship with someone who is different and may suffers from mental illness instead of awkwardly ignoring them. Be more aware of illnesses and stop others from derogatory comments at the least.

If you are mentally ill, acknowledge that your are more susceptible to being abused and you are worth more than that. Isolation is your biggest enemy and find something that gives you self worth whether it be in a job, volunteer work or being a good friend.

It takes all of us whether we are mentally ill, know some one who is or are just bi-standers among people for this violence to end.  Every little word said or action done, makes a difference one way or another.

Deap Brain Stimulation

In the 1940's and 1950's, electric shock therapy was common for treating the mentally ill. A few had favorable outcomes while many didn't. Many came out with broken bones and worse mental health issues like memory loss.

Some theories were, Neurotransmitter theory: The shock works like antidepressants, changing brain receptors to allow chemicals to flow like serotonin.

Anti-convalescent. Inducing seizures in hopes they will dampen abnormal brain function and stabilizing mood.

Neuroendocrine theory: Seizures cause chemicals to release that regulate mood.

Brain Damage Theory: The shock causes memory loss and disorientation while giving the illusion the problems are gone.

This was a barbaric practice because I'm sure they ruined more minds than they saved. Looking back there was such little knowledge and treatment known, this seemed like the best option.

My Grandmother is bipolar and received electric shock therapy, as I understand, of her own requesting. She wanted to be better like at one time I would have drilled a hole in my skull if it had a chance to help me no feel what I did.

Now it is called, deep brain stimulation. Where the electricity travels in ones body is more controlled as well as the patients who receive it. Studies show improvement in a majority of percentage of patients. Tests still need to be done but improvements and understanding of electricity helping people with mental illness is improving.

Electricity for mentally ill patients feels barbaric but there are possibilities for future understanding. When they started they knew nothing about the consequences, only the faith it would help some. Now they only use it in extreme cases, the research is growing and will one day be practiced daily.