I had to move back home when I was diagnosed, which is a full days drive. I've gotten a lot better but there's one thing that is holding me back. I don't have any of my old friends here or any familiar places to go that has a good memory attached with it, when I was healthy. What do I do? Move back?
It's hard to create good memories because of a lack of motivation. It's hard to get out there and find new friends when the world, most of all the city I live in doesn't motivate me to be happy. There isn't a prescription drug I can take to make me over come this problem. Do you feel this way?
Now that it's spring and the weather is good, I think I'll try and go to a park. I'll look for a tree I find interesting and read or draw under it. I hope this will be a good step in finding that safe and happy place.
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Trusting Youself
I depend on two people in my life that I trust to let me know if I show signs of unbalance where I need to see my Phyc Dr. One is my brother, who is like a best friend and the other is a very close friend who I trust, this partly because his uncle has a mental disorder and he is open minded in many aspects.
I was recently faced with an aggravating skepticism that one of those two people wasn't looking out for my best interest. I questioned my own judgment versus that person's advise on my mental status. I realized he was wrong and was leading me astray. He was going through some of his own problems so he couldn't see mine clearly. He used his position in my life to boast to people how great he helps me and how much he has done for me. To top it all of, he has shared my whole medical history like candy, without my permission.
First of all it's good to have at least two people that your completely honest with and they're educated about your mental illness so if you question one opinion, you can get a second opinion from the other person. Also, don't let people get to you by demeaning you and underestimating your ability to think straight. It takes time after being diagnosed but you can be completely normally or even better than normal again. Some people in my life blame anything and everything I think or do on my bipolar disorder. It's like a letter on my forehead but I have an actual personality, even when I'm taking my prescriptions. It's OK to keep some passion and mood, within the grey area, remember when something interferes with your daily life, that's when you should get help to change it.
Accept help and for it when you need it. Most of all, believe in yourself and your future.
Write back about some of your experiences with your or family's mental illness, especially the problems between other people and you. Let me know of some of your mood swings or any other thing you have on your mind and I'll comment back on it. What are some subjects you would like me to write about?
I was recently faced with an aggravating skepticism that one of those two people wasn't looking out for my best interest. I questioned my own judgment versus that person's advise on my mental status. I realized he was wrong and was leading me astray. He was going through some of his own problems so he couldn't see mine clearly. He used his position in my life to boast to people how great he helps me and how much he has done for me. To top it all of, he has shared my whole medical history like candy, without my permission.
First of all it's good to have at least two people that your completely honest with and they're educated about your mental illness so if you question one opinion, you can get a second opinion from the other person. Also, don't let people get to you by demeaning you and underestimating your ability to think straight. It takes time after being diagnosed but you can be completely normally or even better than normal again. Some people in my life blame anything and everything I think or do on my bipolar disorder. It's like a letter on my forehead but I have an actual personality, even when I'm taking my prescriptions. It's OK to keep some passion and mood, within the grey area, remember when something interferes with your daily life, that's when you should get help to change it.
Accept help and for it when you need it. Most of all, believe in yourself and your future.
Write back about some of your experiences with your or family's mental illness, especially the problems between other people and you. Let me know of some of your mood swings or any other thing you have on your mind and I'll comment back on it. What are some subjects you would like me to write about?
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