Different noises can effect anyone's nerves in different ways. When some one has a anxiety disorder or other mental illness like Bipolar disorder, noises most likely effect them more.
No matter how healthy I become, certain noises drive me up the wall and others almost make me feel crazy again. I used to work in a lab which had machines going all day. Even though it wasn't loud the grinding and humming made me feel like crawling up a wall.
Right now the 2010 winter Olympics are being held in the city where I live and I'm within 15min from about 1/2 of the events. There is excitement in the air, and I can hear live bands playing ever night as well as the fire works, bars, parties and people in the streets from the time it gets dark to about 4:00 in the morning. It's driving me crazy!
The only way I can deal with it is to keep my TV on loud when I go to sleep and spend the night at other people's houses every once and a while.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Am I My Mood Disorder?
I would like the world to look at me and accept and appreciate me with having bipolar disorder. I know that when others look at me and know I have bipolar disorder that they come to conclusions about who I am because of all the stereotypes there are in the world. I fight to bring down those incorrect stereotypes and educate others not to be afraid, or ostracize people like me but some times I have a desire to use the stereotypes to my own advantage. Do I have the right to do that? Is it so bad to want to use what others has disadvantaged me with for my own advantage or benefit?
Some people close to me hear my opinionated ways and blame my actions and reactions on my mental illness when it may not be that, it may just be who I am and they don't like my views. This is one exaple that makes me feel that if every one else is giving an excuse for what they don't like about me, why can't I do and say things that aren't pc and blame it on my mental illness?
Why can't I use this to my advantage in my life? It lessens my responsibilities for my actions and the words I say. I do know that there is a limit that needs to be followed though.
This is some of my thoughts that go through my head when I'm tired of fighting. I get so tired of being a strong person in the way of not using bipolar disorder as an excuse or obstacle that makes my life look as meaningful and productive as others.
Some people close to me hear my opinionated ways and blame my actions and reactions on my mental illness when it may not be that, it may just be who I am and they don't like my views. This is one exaple that makes me feel that if every one else is giving an excuse for what they don't like about me, why can't I do and say things that aren't pc and blame it on my mental illness?
Why can't I use this to my advantage in my life? It lessens my responsibilities for my actions and the words I say. I do know that there is a limit that needs to be followed though.
This is some of my thoughts that go through my head when I'm tired of fighting. I get so tired of being a strong person in the way of not using bipolar disorder as an excuse or obstacle that makes my life look as meaningful and productive as others.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Loneliness.... Is It A Decision
Looking over the past few years of my life I have blanketed myself under the expression, 'I'd rather be alone with myself than lonely with some one else.' I thought it was quite cleaver to discover this and it worked out so well that it almost seemed to have a religious affect on my life.
I'm a little older now where people have gone beyond asking, 'when are you getting married,' to family desperately pleading for me to procreate with any suitable match that they discovered while attending a social group here and there, talking with potential mothers......grandmothers, OK not that old I think.
So many people I know feel alone not necessarily because they have no partner but from not having a general closeness to others. I hear and use reasons why like, I have higher standards for people, etc, etc, but where is the line of cautious and scarred?
I have 'learned' so many past lessons that has made me ridiculously cautious of people while I still quietly hold on to my curiosity of excitement and danger. It's the 'program' in my head of what I learned that has surrounded my mind with a barrier in which I won't let any one else get in. I can make myself sound great by saying I have such a high standard for friends and will never settle, but that's a bunch of bull-shit!
I'm comfortable with being lonely and don't want to take the chance, as long as I can blame my loneliness on some one else. I have been deciding to be lonely over taking risks. I'm making excuses that sound great for my actions while I'm covering up the fear I have. Am I comfortable?
I see many of my friends feeling a similar way. Some things are comfortable, even things that aren't good for us so we have to deside to first recognize it, then do some thing about it.
I'm a little older now where people have gone beyond asking, 'when are you getting married,' to family desperately pleading for me to procreate with any suitable match that they discovered while attending a social group here and there, talking with potential mothers......grandmothers, OK not that old I think.
So many people I know feel alone not necessarily because they have no partner but from not having a general closeness to others. I hear and use reasons why like, I have higher standards for people, etc, etc, but where is the line of cautious and scarred?
I have 'learned' so many past lessons that has made me ridiculously cautious of people while I still quietly hold on to my curiosity of excitement and danger. It's the 'program' in my head of what I learned that has surrounded my mind with a barrier in which I won't let any one else get in. I can make myself sound great by saying I have such a high standard for friends and will never settle, but that's a bunch of bull-shit!
I'm comfortable with being lonely and don't want to take the chance, as long as I can blame my loneliness on some one else. I have been deciding to be lonely over taking risks. I'm making excuses that sound great for my actions while I'm covering up the fear I have. Am I comfortable?
I see many of my friends feeling a similar way. Some things are comfortable, even things that aren't good for us so we have to deside to first recognize it, then do some thing about it.
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Service Dogs
I have been looking into service or assistance animals for people who suffer from mental disorders for a while now. This research is for myself and others who suffer illnesses like epilepsy and other disabilities that aren't as visually obvious as seeing and hearing eye dogs.
Some benefits to having a service dog for ie: bipolar disorder is training them to do various tasks like, wake you during an emergency, dial certain phone numbers, remind you to take your medication at certain times and even get it for you as well as a glass of water, help you in public by forcing people to be a certain distance from you and if you become overwhelmed b/c of the crowd he/she can be trained to look like he/she needs to go to the washroom. A service dog will also feel your moods. If your depressed or manic, they can be trained to cuddle you for comfort or inform you of your manic state.
At first I was interested in a dog b/c I was concerned I would wake up at night if there was a fire or an intruder after I took my sleeping pill. Also I'm paranoid of all intruders.
When I lived with my parents a few yrs ago, I became close to there parrots. These to birds helped me tremendously by being there with me and feeling my moods, knowing what to say when I was depressed and playing games with me when I needed my spirit lifted.
A service or assistance dog for seeing or a mental disability has the same legalities. I have been working on increasing the awareness for the need of trainers for service dogs for people with mental disabilities for a while now. If you are interested in some thing like this please let me know, or if you want information I'll be happy to give you what I have. pandora106@hotmail.com
Some benefits to having a service dog for ie: bipolar disorder is training them to do various tasks like, wake you during an emergency, dial certain phone numbers, remind you to take your medication at certain times and even get it for you as well as a glass of water, help you in public by forcing people to be a certain distance from you and if you become overwhelmed b/c of the crowd he/she can be trained to look like he/she needs to go to the washroom. A service dog will also feel your moods. If your depressed or manic, they can be trained to cuddle you for comfort or inform you of your manic state.
At first I was interested in a dog b/c I was concerned I would wake up at night if there was a fire or an intruder after I took my sleeping pill. Also I'm paranoid of all intruders.
When I lived with my parents a few yrs ago, I became close to there parrots. These to birds helped me tremendously by being there with me and feeling my moods, knowing what to say when I was depressed and playing games with me when I needed my spirit lifted.
A service or assistance dog for seeing or a mental disability has the same legalities. I have been working on increasing the awareness for the need of trainers for service dogs for people with mental disabilities for a while now. If you are interested in some thing like this please let me know, or if you want information I'll be happy to give you what I have. pandora106@hotmail.com
What Do I Do When It Happens To You?
Over and over again I hear stories of people who have loved ones with the onset of a mental illness and they have no clue what to do. I understand both the point of view of the loved one and the one who is going through this mental turmoil.
The loved one has no idea how to help and is often scared of the others actions while the one who is going through this illness is doubting every one. When some one tries to get close to help, often this person pulls back because of paranoid distrust.
There are many triggers that either make an existing condition or ignite the creation of bipolar disorder become unmanageable. It is hard for the person who has it and other people around them. The first and biggest advise I can give to a loved one of a person suffering from a mental illness is to first understand it. Begin to understand what they are going through by research, joining groups on the web and in your community and talking to people on-line.
Only then can you recommend certain therapies to this person in your life. You will know how to bring it up, and often in the beginning you can't be obvious, understand how your words sound to a person with mental disabilities and what they mean, most importantly to continually be a supportive person on there life's path to become a healthier person.
Being supportive means not pushing them into a phase of recovery or diagram of what you see they should be in instead encouraging their growth by verbal praise while supporting them, not as a perpetual crutch but as a support. Be that person's advocate by finding government and insurance help etc. Be a person that they can feal like their not judged and can talk to about mental difficulties and changes.
Please, if you need some one to talk to about your disability or a loved one's disability, please don't hesitate to mail me. pandora106@hotmail.com
The loved one has no idea how to help and is often scared of the others actions while the one who is going through this illness is doubting every one. When some one tries to get close to help, often this person pulls back because of paranoid distrust.
There are many triggers that either make an existing condition or ignite the creation of bipolar disorder become unmanageable. It is hard for the person who has it and other people around them. The first and biggest advise I can give to a loved one of a person suffering from a mental illness is to first understand it. Begin to understand what they are going through by research, joining groups on the web and in your community and talking to people on-line.
Only then can you recommend certain therapies to this person in your life. You will know how to bring it up, and often in the beginning you can't be obvious, understand how your words sound to a person with mental disabilities and what they mean, most importantly to continually be a supportive person on there life's path to become a healthier person.
Being supportive means not pushing them into a phase of recovery or diagram of what you see they should be in instead encouraging their growth by verbal praise while supporting them, not as a perpetual crutch but as a support. Be that person's advocate by finding government and insurance help etc. Be a person that they can feal like their not judged and can talk to about mental difficulties and changes.
Please, if you need some one to talk to about your disability or a loved one's disability, please don't hesitate to mail me. pandora106@hotmail.com
Friday, November 27, 2009
Two Crazies Don't Make A Right
Have you ever had a friend that seemed down on there luck and just needed a hand to get back on there feet, most often a kind word or a push of encouragement? There's an instinct in us to help others and it often becomes stronger when you need or have needed help yourself, when you can relate to other people in need. This is why a lot of abused women end up helping other abused women or cancer patients bond with each other. We find common ground and want to help each other even if you may not have gone through that particular hurdle in your life, for some it is easy to empathize with them if you have felt another reach out to you.
Before I continue, to any one in a situation who needs help themselves, YOU CAN NOT GIVE TO ANOTHER WHAT YOU NEED FOR YOUR SELF. Relating to depression and mental disorders, we often need emotional help in one way or another. Until you have been given and have helped yourself in this area you can't help another like you. This is why care givers/parents should make sure they're looked after first. Once you have gotten strength, energy and help from others is when you can be a powerful influence on others lives.
Most of us has had people in our lives with the kind of person that tells you all of there problems and asks for advice but never takes it and you find yourself in the same place you started, listening to the same problems and hearing the same questions being asked. What do you do without being mean? And when you have let it go on so long it makes it that much harder. All they do is drain your energy like a leech.
Every person has a comfort spot, but some are dangerous to others. Some people prey on sympathy of others to feed a need so they can stay in a dark warm hole and no matter what any one does, that worm isn't coming out! The food is your personal empathy and energy and tinstinct takes over like an misbehaved child.
Obviously this is coming from a resent experience. When I tried to cut this friendship off , they kept on pulling on my strings and throwing the rope back in, making me feel bad for not catching it.
If you are suffering from a loss of energy and want more, this includes every day people and regular depression, the following formula will describe the steps needed to produce energy.
Stage 1-
Dream. Look into a future with you in it and imagine your self doing some thing you may never thought possible. Dream that all your wishes came true and think of each one at a time. The more you let your self dream thoughts of what can be, the more energy you will get.
Stage 2 –
Desire. Write down a list of your desires from A – Z. These are things you may have always wanted to do or things you start to think of as you start writing.
Stage 3 –
Goals. Start to write short term goals then long term ones. You have been letting your mind go free and think of possibilities, these should be about those possibilities but achievable. Once you write a goal on paper it's funny, without thinking too much about it, how easy it is to achieve those goals. Start with daily ones that you can see them crossed off at the end of the day then have monthly, yearly, and 5,10 15 yr annually ones.
Stage 4-
Achievement. To achieve each goal this will give you energy. The bigger the goal, often the more energy you will receive. This is why it is good to have daily goals especially when you don't feel good.
Remember to never give energy you don't have. You need energy to create more for yourself.
Before I continue, to any one in a situation who needs help themselves, YOU CAN NOT GIVE TO ANOTHER WHAT YOU NEED FOR YOUR SELF. Relating to depression and mental disorders, we often need emotional help in one way or another. Until you have been given and have helped yourself in this area you can't help another like you. This is why care givers/parents should make sure they're looked after first. Once you have gotten strength, energy and help from others is when you can be a powerful influence on others lives.
Most of us has had people in our lives with the kind of person that tells you all of there problems and asks for advice but never takes it and you find yourself in the same place you started, listening to the same problems and hearing the same questions being asked. What do you do without being mean? And when you have let it go on so long it makes it that much harder. All they do is drain your energy like a leech.
Every person has a comfort spot, but some are dangerous to others. Some people prey on sympathy of others to feed a need so they can stay in a dark warm hole and no matter what any one does, that worm isn't coming out! The food is your personal empathy and energy and tinstinct takes over like an misbehaved child.
Obviously this is coming from a resent experience. When I tried to cut this friendship off , they kept on pulling on my strings and throwing the rope back in, making me feel bad for not catching it.
If you are suffering from a loss of energy and want more, this includes every day people and regular depression, the following formula will describe the steps needed to produce energy.
Stage 1-
Dream. Look into a future with you in it and imagine your self doing some thing you may never thought possible. Dream that all your wishes came true and think of each one at a time. The more you let your self dream thoughts of what can be, the more energy you will get.
Stage 2 –
Desire. Write down a list of your desires from A – Z. These are things you may have always wanted to do or things you start to think of as you start writing.
Stage 3 –
Goals. Start to write short term goals then long term ones. You have been letting your mind go free and think of possibilities, these should be about those possibilities but achievable. Once you write a goal on paper it's funny, without thinking too much about it, how easy it is to achieve those goals. Start with daily ones that you can see them crossed off at the end of the day then have monthly, yearly, and 5,10 15 yr annually ones.
Stage 4-
Achievement. To achieve each goal this will give you energy. The bigger the goal, often the more energy you will receive. This is why it is good to have daily goals especially when you don't feel good.
Remember to never give energy you don't have. You need energy to create more for yourself.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Friday, October 16, 2009
No RX's... Natural answers
I have not written any thing about natural forms regarding depression or bipolar disorder. RX drugs are not always the 'end all be all' to solve these disorders. Besides cognitive and other therapy's I'd like to offer up some information on vitamins that may help you. In writing this I express that if you do need to see a Dr. please do. Also some Dr's will help by going through the journey of finding the right combination of vitamins or vitamins and RX drugs.
Food and your style of living has a major part to play in your over well being. A regular schedule of activities, sleep and dietary needs is important. Dietary needs exclude large amounts of sugar and caffeine.
Moving on to vitamins. Keep in mind that vitamins are forms of drugs also and you should be well informed about them before taking high doses or have a Dr. overlooking you. Omega-3 fatty acids.... You can buy this in a capsuale and get it from eating fish. Some companies make a combination of Omega oils that are for depression. In the past I have found it helpful with depression. It is also helpful for bipolor disor, anxiety, post traumatic disorder and others. For more information go to http://www.consumerhealthdigest.com/omegafattyacids.htm
Vitamin D. This is a vitamin you get from the sun and it helps your mood. In some places, during the winter, there isn't a lot of sun. There are a lot of different studies on how much you should take per day of this vitamin. Since it is water soluble, it is safe to take a max amount. The min amount every one should take is 1000-2000 IU. It will also help you with cancer and flu's. You can not get this supplement in your normal diet. For further information go to http://www.naturalnews.com/Vitamin_D.html http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Can_a_Vitamin_D_deficiency_mimic_bipolar_disorder http://www.vitamindcouncil.org/mentalIllness.shtml
5htp, it's like an ati-depressant. It helps the serotonin balance in the brain. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/5-Hydroxytryptophan
Vitamin B. It is essential for nerve stimulation and for metabolism of carbohydrates to give brain energy as well as body energy. Deficiency symptoms include mood disorders, anxiety, insomnia, restlessness, night terror etc. http://www.depression-guide.com/b-depression-vitamin.htm
A study that started in the University Of Calgary and is now studied threw out north America is that people with mental illnesses, including depression, lack vitamins. To put these vitamins in the body in extreme high doses, helps the brain function. This company is called True Hope. The main vitamins are A,C and D's. This is what I'm going on right now. I'm lowering my RX drugs as I increase my doses of theirs. They have online help as well as an 1-800 line available. The site is www.truehope.com
If you have had sucsess with a natural way of dealing with your disorder please contact me.
Food and your style of living has a major part to play in your over well being. A regular schedule of activities, sleep and dietary needs is important. Dietary needs exclude large amounts of sugar and caffeine.
Moving on to vitamins. Keep in mind that vitamins are forms of drugs also and you should be well informed about them before taking high doses or have a Dr. overlooking you. Omega-3 fatty acids.... You can buy this in a capsuale and get it from eating fish. Some companies make a combination of Omega oils that are for depression. In the past I have found it helpful with depression. It is also helpful for bipolor disor, anxiety, post traumatic disorder and others. For more information go to http://www.consumerhealthdigest.com/omegafattyacids.htm
Vitamin D. This is a vitamin you get from the sun and it helps your mood. In some places, during the winter, there isn't a lot of sun. There are a lot of different studies on how much you should take per day of this vitamin. Since it is water soluble, it is safe to take a max amount. The min amount every one should take is 1000-2000 IU. It will also help you with cancer and flu's. You can not get this supplement in your normal diet. For further information go to http://www.naturalnews.com/Vitamin_D.html http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Can_a_Vitamin_D_deficiency_mimic_bipolar_disorder http://www.vitamindcouncil.org/mentalIllness.shtml
5htp, it's like an ati-depressant. It helps the serotonin balance in the brain. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/5-Hydroxytryptophan
Vitamin B. It is essential for nerve stimulation and for metabolism of carbohydrates to give brain energy as well as body energy. Deficiency symptoms include mood disorders, anxiety, insomnia, restlessness, night terror etc. http://www.depression-guide.com/b-depression-vitamin.htm
A study that started in the University Of Calgary and is now studied threw out north America is that people with mental illnesses, including depression, lack vitamins. To put these vitamins in the body in extreme high doses, helps the brain function. This company is called True Hope. The main vitamins are A,C and D's. This is what I'm going on right now. I'm lowering my RX drugs as I increase my doses of theirs. They have online help as well as an 1-800 line available. The site is www.truehope.com
If you have had sucsess with a natural way of dealing with your disorder please contact me.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Homeless Myths
From my point of view I see some things differently. I get frustrated on how homeless people are viewed and treated. Friends of mine make comments like, 'get a job' and treat them like they are beneath them.
The city I live in has a lot of homeless people I'm ashamed to say. One day thought about this asking the question why. I had to do a little research. Most homeless people have mental disabilities. They may look well and able on the out side to you but there is a lot of other issues going on that disable them from keeping a job and living within our society. Some people see them begging on the street and all they think is, 'they want to get money to buy drugs and alcohol.' Well, that's true! It's self medication and often the only way people survive. If you want, buy them food.
Many view abusing drugs will give you a mental disorder and that may be the case for some but most of the time if some one is abusing, it's the symptom. It's hard in this society, mental disorders are shuned and the symptoms are not common knowledge so it's difficult to know if you have a problem. It's so hard to find help and when you do it may take a while for you to feel better. Drugs have an immediate fix.
You'll never understand how close you are to those look down upon until it's happened to you. Most people live pay check to pay check. A few bad months..... a mental break down... and that's you on the side walk. It pretty much happened to me and thank God I had family that was able to take care of me and support me.
Some one said to me the other day after I shared my views, 'most of them don't want help.' I got so mad. First of all, there is no actual real help out there and how would you know what help is when you have never seen your world any different. My city shut down our main mental institute and the homeless population rose tremendously. I didn't know what normal was until I got help. Mental disorder is a different mental state.
I think it's important for people to be aware of these issues for a number of reasons. Treat every one like a human because you'll never know how one smile or nice word will affect some one. Being empathetic towards a person, making them feel as if you look at them with no judgement can do a world of good. Knowledge about this can be golden. If some one gets help early on it's very easy to treat and a lot less painful. It's like cancer, if you catch it in the early stages you have more options on treatment and a greater survival rate.
The city I live in has a lot of homeless people I'm ashamed to say. One day thought about this asking the question why. I had to do a little research. Most homeless people have mental disabilities. They may look well and able on the out side to you but there is a lot of other issues going on that disable them from keeping a job and living within our society. Some people see them begging on the street and all they think is, 'they want to get money to buy drugs and alcohol.' Well, that's true! It's self medication and often the only way people survive. If you want, buy them food.
Many view abusing drugs will give you a mental disorder and that may be the case for some but most of the time if some one is abusing, it's the symptom. It's hard in this society, mental disorders are shuned and the symptoms are not common knowledge so it's difficult to know if you have a problem. It's so hard to find help and when you do it may take a while for you to feel better. Drugs have an immediate fix.
You'll never understand how close you are to those look down upon until it's happened to you. Most people live pay check to pay check. A few bad months..... a mental break down... and that's you on the side walk. It pretty much happened to me and thank God I had family that was able to take care of me and support me.
Some one said to me the other day after I shared my views, 'most of them don't want help.' I got so mad. First of all, there is no actual real help out there and how would you know what help is when you have never seen your world any different. My city shut down our main mental institute and the homeless population rose tremendously. I didn't know what normal was until I got help. Mental disorder is a different mental state.
I think it's important for people to be aware of these issues for a number of reasons. Treat every one like a human because you'll never know how one smile or nice word will affect some one. Being empathetic towards a person, making them feel as if you look at them with no judgement can do a world of good. Knowledge about this can be golden. If some one gets help early on it's very easy to treat and a lot less painful. It's like cancer, if you catch it in the early stages you have more options on treatment and a greater survival rate.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Skipping Medication
Earlier this week I had the flew. I couldn't keep anything down. I know that some people with mental disorders don't need to take medication but those who do depend on it every day and when the daily dose is missed, that disrupts mental balance for up to a week.
Obviously, not keeping food or fluids down means not being able to take my medication. Fortunately I had a place to stay during this time where I had some one by me if I went into either a manic or depressive episode, they could take care of me. It's important that if this happens to you that you can talk to some one about your situation so they can keep an eye on you, even if it's your Doctor.
I can't express how important it is for you to find a friend, family member or be close to your Doctor for reasons such as these.
Obviously, not keeping food or fluids down means not being able to take my medication. Fortunately I had a place to stay during this time where I had some one by me if I went into either a manic or depressive episode, they could take care of me. It's important that if this happens to you that you can talk to some one about your situation so they can keep an eye on you, even if it's your Doctor.
I can't express how important it is for you to find a friend, family member or be close to your Doctor for reasons such as these.
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